Jenn.nu
*Other links: So 2001
Sarai: Why?
Becky: That’s a question not even God can answer.
Sarai: I mean, do we really have to know her sexcapades? Isn’t it bad enough we have to look at her pictures/know her entire breast anatomy/can’t look at a spoon the same way again?!?
WILL THE MADNESS NEVER CEASE?
Becky: But without knowing about her sexcapades we’d never know that 1) she’s a wife and mother, 2) capable of attracting a man (any man), 3) she’d never get any attention from TGO or her zombie followers. So why wouldn’t she post about having sex in a graveyard?
Sarai: You say that like it’s a bad thing.
Becky: Isn’t it?
Sarai: Graveyard?! I just thought of someone rolling in their graves while the ground starts receeding… from the bumping and grinding and all.
Becky: Yes a graveyard. Poor dead people, when I die I’m going to put a special anti-humping device on my grave.
Sarai: I don’t think that device will hold everyone, if you know what I mean. Unless you jumped some hurdles. God knows I’ll be a fucking blimp by the time you die. I’d definitely do the nasty all over your tombstone, bb.
Becky: Thanks for the mental imagery Sarai, I just got through reading about Jenn’s plus-sized sex life and I don’t need to hear about your future fat sex!
Sarai:
Sometimes I dig romance and intimacy, other times slap my ass and call me your dirty little whore. Hah.
Now is that really necessary?
Becky: I don’t care if you’re Spike himself, use a little bit of tact please.
12. EVER HAVE A THREESOME?
Yes. Once.
Sarai: Oh for fuck’s sake.
Becky: Girl Girl Boy or Boy Boy Girl? I wonder if s/he was also fat.
Sarai: Rebecca, ask that shit and I will gut you.
Hasn’t she always been a BBW? I haven’t been around her too long.
Becky: Yeah she’s always been a whale. And BBW? * slaps the shit out of Sarai *
Sarai: Big Boned Whale?
Becky: Oh, that’s what you meant… I’m sorry for slapping the shit out of you Sarai. As a sign of my forgiveness I would like to present to you: My best weave.
Sarai: What else could I have meant?
Oh shit, son!
Becky: The more common definition is Big Beautiful Woman, which is what I thought you meant. And those must be some mighty big bones. Can we talk about the whole graveyard sex having thing?
Sarai: Oh right, let’s. I would like to talk of nothing else, actually.
Becky: There’s a thin line between bravery and stupidity, which side are you on?
Sarai: Can I phone a lifeline?
Becky: What the fuck do you think this is, Wheel of Fortune?
Sarai: Well it’s a difficult question!
Becky: Either you’re stupi- oh forget I ever asked.
So she could have used her bed, her car, her parents bed, a field or a kitchen counter and she chose a graveyard? I can’t help but wonder if she isn’t a bit of a closet necrophiliac. BECAUSE THAT IS JUST PLAIN CREEPY DUDE.
Sarai: Forget that. How the hell did she do it on a picnic table? Those aren’t very sturdy? And in a church? Come on now.
Becky: Beats me, I haven’t had one in years but they’re usually pretty rickity from being exposed to the elements. If it wiggled and jerked around under my 9 year old 90lb butt then I can’t imagine it being able to support the blubber from two sperm whales.
Sarai: Yeah, me neither.
Becky: The church is again disrespectful, at least have some respect for other peoples beliefs and don’t do the nasty in their place of worship.
Sarai: I agree. Some places are just out of bounds, people. It can’t be hard to walk outside and bump n’ grind in your automobile.
And again, this just makes me think of the whole Shit You Need To Keep To Yourself On The Internet debate.
Becky: I still can’t help but wonder if she deliberately eggs people like us on because she likes the attention. That must be it, she must like being talked about and well known (probably because of the lack of a real life thing).
Sarai: It can’t be far from the truth. What else could it be?
Becky: There is such a thing as tact and whatnot, I just don’t understand why she doesn’t use it. But enough with that, let’s try to figure out how she could have sex in the shower. I’m thinking doggy style?
Sarai: BECKY. YOU JUST HAD TO TAKE IT THERE.
Becky: I’M SORRY BUT INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW! Dan couldn’t lift her so HOW DID THEY DO IT!?
Sarai: INQUIRING MINDS?! WHERE?! I’LL MAKE THEM SEE REASON, JUST GIMME FIVE MINUTES WITH THEM.
Becky: Um never mind then. I’d have to be holding your weave and letting you beat the shit out of me at the same time. And we all know what happens when Sarai’s weave gets wrecked.
Sarai: Shit happens, that’s what.
But as to the positions in the shower… I’m guessing a really creative twist on Reverse Cowgirl?
Becky: Okay moving on. Unless she replies to my query on what was going through her mind when she desecrated a graveyard I really have nothing else to say other than this: I hope TGO has fun with her, people who can’t get the concept of private information need to fuck off and die.
Sarai: She won’t reply. What could she possibly say? “DOZE PPL ARE DEAD LOL”
Becky: Actually that’s what I’m expecting, but dead people deserve respect too!
Sarai: Yeah well, don’t get your hopes up.
Becky: I’m not don’t worry.
Becky: Do you have anything else to say or are you trying to save your stomach?
Sarai: LOL I have nothing more to add except that: I really hope these surveys don’t jump from website to website. Especially Colleen’s and Janet’s. Or even Nat Marie. Christ. * shudder *
It would be too much, I’m sorry.
Becky: That is not nice Sarai. Not nice at all.
Sarai: Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot we were channeling Ecstasy here.
Becky: Fuck off. I mean the mental imagery it provided was not nice, not nice at all.
Sarai: Oh suck it up pussybear.
Becky: Don’t call me pussybear, Miss Piggy.
You know, back when I joined YS.nu, I honestly thought that Jenn’s site was a rather good one. Oh don’t get me wrong, not because I liked it (heck I couldn’t bring myself to write a review for it), but because there were all those people commenting on her site.
But thankfully, it appears that I’m not the only one who’s reluctant to read all those sexcapades :P
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haha you make me laugh every time I read one of your reviews. I agree, she does put a lot of unnecessary shit on the internet. I think the graveyard thing was taken out of context though because she did say it was in her car outsie a graveyard, but still it is disgusting.
Bobbi-lee · Aug 4, 09:57 PM · · Permalink